My folks are pretty caught up in themselves - sounds awful but they have just moved past the small kid stuff so really don't get the inconvenience, difficulties etc especially when it comes to catching up. They are retired and still don't come to us. We have to go to them also - I decided that I could make a fuss but really nothing would change. I don't think they mean it either rather they just don't get it. We have tried to be more forth coming with more formal invites - so come for coffee/lunch etc on x date so they commit or not rather than a vague you know where we are, ITMS??? It has worked much better for us since then. Good luck!